Indiana Jones Loses His Goddamned Hat

Posted in Fun and Crazy, Indiana Jones on December 10th, 2011 by Willie

So, its common knowledge that there are some gaping plot holes in the “Raiders of the Lost Ark,” the first Indiana Jones movie.  One is, how did Indiana Jones know how to close his eyes when the Nazis opened the Ark?  Another is, how did he escape the island when all the Nazis died in the ensuing ghost melting party?  The most famous one is concerns how Indiana Jones got to that island in the first place.  We swim him swim to the submarine, climb on top of it, then the film wipes to the dock the Nazis land in, and Indiana Jones looks really wet.  How in hell did he manage this?  Wasn’t the submarine closed?  Wouldn’t someone notice if he climbed in?  Well, according to the original script, Indiana uses his whip to lash himself onto the periscope and sort of surfs along somehow.  Here is an image with a tiny Indiana Jones model mounted on top of the periscope of the submarine.

The sheer lunacy of this stunt was cut from the final movie, and most people never noticed how Indy made it to the secret Nazi island.  However, it was during the close examination of this scene last night, where I made a startling discovery.  When Indiana Jones swims to the submarine, he no longer has his trade marked fedora.  I made sure to rewind and fast forward a bunch of times, but sure enough, by the time Indiana gets to the secret island, he has no hat.  Then he jumps a Nazi guard, steals his uniform, and definitely has no hat.  Where is the hat?  It’s gone!  But wait, isn’t Indiana never supposed to lose his hat?  They make a point of it in each succeeding movie.  As you know, the opening of “The Last Crusade” is dedicated as the origin story of how young Indiana Jones got the hat in the first place.  Hold up, you’re saying, isn’t Indiana Jones wearing his hat at the end of Raiders?  Surely he must have retrieved it from that boat with all the Jamaican dudes, right?  Actually, if you look closely, that is a different hat, his gray fedora; the hat he uses to wear when he travels.

Holy shit.  There is very little discussion on this matter on the internet, but luckily I found one that attempts to explain what happened to his goddamned hat; his lucky iconic hat, the hat he is NEVER supposed to lose.  According to the “internets,” in the original script, it basically says, ‘when Indy boards the submarine, he “loses his hat once and for all.”‘  In the novelization of the movie, Indy even comments on the fact saying, “Finding the ark cost me my favorite hat.”  Then he laughs…!  Now obviously, after “Raiders” debuted as a smash success, iconography was created, sequels were lined up, and hat mania swept the world.  The conveniently missing hat would never be missing again, and like “Last Crusade” depicts, Indiana would never lose the hat his whole life.  According to further novelization, Indiana would have the hat repaired and reblocked countless times, as a simple felt fedora would never be able to survive the destruction and mayhem Indiana exposed it to.  So, is it a conspiracy?  Does Indiana have a closet full of replacement hats, but acts like he never lost the original to prove his hat keeping badassery?  No, there is a much more boring word for the case of Indiana’s missing hat, retcon.

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Harry Belafonte, Jump in the Line

Posted in Harry Belafonte, Youtube Favs on October 20th, 2011 by Willie

And we’re back!  I’m now halfway around the world coming to you live from Seoul, South Korea, and I’d thought to celebrate the occausion by posting one of my all time favorite movie music sequences ever!  Tim Burton’s Beetlejuice was one of the most bizarre movies of the 1980s, and all one has to do to get a taste of it is to watch the very end when he unleashes a ghost filled calypso dance party with Harry Belafotne’s immortal classic, “Jump in the Line,” blaring in all corners of the spirtual universe.  Belafonte, the legendary singer and civil rights activist, was co-musical director of the film alongside equally legendary Danny Elfman (Batman, The Simpsons, Oingo Boingo fame) and together they created a fantastically classic music landscape to one of the most insane movies ever.  Enjoy.

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Ferris Bueller's Day Off, Twist and Shout

Posted in Fun and Crazy, The Beatles, Youtube Favs on August 26th, 2011 by Willie

The greatest cover song the Beatles ever did was of The Isley Brothers 1962 hit, “Twist and Shout.”  Written by Bert Russell and Phil Medley, the original song was a tepid little dance song, but when John Lennon and the Beatles got their hands on it, they redefined rock and roll, and gave the genre one of its most iconic performances.  John Lennon’s throat shredding vocal is one of the greatest expressions of pure joy in the entire universe, and it’ll never ever get old.  When John Hughes had Ferris Bueller (Matthew Broderick) sing the song on a float in downtown Chicago, he only added to the universal authority of the song’s power.  It’s the best scene in a movie that helped put a big cultural stamp a whole generation of 80s and 90s kids.  I wonder what sort of impact, if any, this film has on current and future youthful generations. I have a feeling people will always like it, after all, who doesn’t like Ferraris, ditching school, hanging out with the coolest kid ever, and singing “Twist and Shout” in front of 10,000 people?  Also, Charlie Sheen sums up his entire life through a fictional character at the end.  Amazing.  (Insert daily CBS plug…) Remember  to vote me as CBS’s best local NYC blogger by clicking these words!  Thanks!

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The Beach Boys, The Ramones, Do You Wanna Dance?

Posted in The Beach Boys, The Ramones, Youtube Favs on June 20th, 2011 by Willie

Part 95 is a double dose of glorious rock and roll.  I’ve got the Beach Boys and the Ramones rocking the Bobby Freeman classic, “Do You Wanna Dance?.”  In the Beach Boys version, drummer Dennis Wilson takes the lead vocals, and man is he good.  Dennis was the only Beach Boy that actually surfed, and like his brothers and cousins, was a fantastic singer.  I love the Beach Boys version for their gorgeous harmonies and almost indie rock slacker like take on the song.  This video is also hilarious to see Mike Love just dance off on the side not contributing nothing to the song but Beach Boys vibe and attitude.  The Ramones version is just as good, if not better.  Recorded for Rocket to Russia, the Ramones are shown ripping their version of the song through the halls of Rock ‘N’ Roll High School, the 1979 Roger Corman cult classic.  The Beach Boys were always a favorite of the Ramones, and they bring all the high octane distorted punk joy they can to this number, making it one of the greatest covers of all time in my opinion.  So, in conclusion, the answer to the question is, yes, I wanna dance…RIGHT NOW!


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